Tuesday, December 23, 2003

I Hate Detroit

When I awoke at 11:20 on the plane from Minnesota to Detroit I realized my next flight left at 12, panic started to sink in. After we got off the plane at 11:40 and I found my flight to be on the other side of the airport, I almost started to cry. I started to tear when I realized Detroit is the Hell of all architectural anything and there are more stairs in there than a Tibetan monastery. I was running and running and finally got there at 11:55 only to find out they were running late and would begin boarding momentarily. In my tired, cranky, panicky, crying state I almost punched the happy man sitting next to me in the nose. That bastard.

The Fat Man

I sat next to the fattest man in the world on my 7.5 hour flight from Honolulu to Minnesota. He was so fat he needed a seatbelt extender to fasten his. His fat sasquach legs and arm kept bumping into me as I willed myself into a tiny little ball reading Harry Potter by the window. The turbulence made his fat jliggle and roll more than an N*Sync video. He invaded my seat. I paid for a whole one, I only got half of it. He stared me down when I got my food first. I was afraid he was going to eat me.

YAY FOR SNOW!!!

It's SNOWING!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!! WOHOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, December 17, 2003

Party

I love Taco Bell's chicken fiesta burrito. It's like a fiesta in my mouth!

Tuesday, December 16, 2003

Gross

In my new book, 101 Tropical Drinks, they have this section called "oddities". Now RS and I came to the conclusion that some people sat around and thought "What should definately NOT go together?" and "How can we make everybody who drinks this throw up?"

Three concoctions you will definately be tasting twice (in order of vomit scale numbering):

Velociraptor (6.5 on vomit scale)
1 1/2 oz. vodka
4 Tbsp. Chicken broth
3 dashes Tobasco sauce
Shake and pour over ice in highball glass. Garnish with a slice of carrot.

Real Pirates Grog (7.1 on vomit scale)
1 pkg. instant oatmeal (Quaker instant Oatmeal Cinamon & Spice preferred)
2 cans beer
1/2 c. spiced rum
Dash paprika
Cook oatmeal using the beer. Stir in other ingredients. Serves 4 (yeah right).

And the winner of gross (8.7 on vomit scale):

Saladtosser (name says it all)
1/3 oz. tequila (preferably Black Death tequila)
1/3 oz. Absolut Peppar Vodka
1/3 oz. A-1 Steak Sauce
Chocolate Syrup
Corn Kernals
Layer in a shot glass. Garnish the rim of glass with chocolate syrup and top with corn kernals.

Hours

Hours of Mindless fun. Throw Santa across a ravine. My farthest dropping distance was 343.10. Click to run, click and hold to arm, and let go to release! I can see Rudolph, but what does he do??

*Update* I got a 346.1 and slid right into Rudolph. He didn't do a damn thing.

Oldest Penis

Oldest penis in the world was a swimmer.

Changing Times

As the final days of this semester come to a close, I think it is only fitting to look at the progression of bug colonies in the 3rd floor bathroom.
In chronological order:

~ Flies - they have continued throughout the semester

~ The big-ass red ants with black stripes on the ass - showed up after ceiling panels were moved, I think they were exterminated. They're little dead bodies were everywhere.

~Flying ants - showed up at the same time the red ants did. They did not die and probably formed...

~ The eerily tiny ants that crawl under the mirror from the hole in the wall to the trash can- they are still thriving also.

~The big bee infestation - short lived

~ The wasp infestation - also short lived

~ The one large moth that sat on the ceiling - disappeared after 3 days

~ The little furry bee infestation - unfortunately, was long lasting. The bees became many, and when they did die, you had to be careful not to step on they poisoned carcasses.

~ The tiny mosquito things in the showers - well, the started there at least. This is the most current bug colony. I think they were breeding in out pipes. Now, when you take a shower there are many bug carcasses on the walls and you can kill 3 by just putting your hand on the wall. You spend about 5 min at the start just killing bugs. They are starting to migrate out of the bathroom. I saw many of these over-active, annoyingly small buggers in the light in the 3rd floor commons.

Apparently the gecko family that lives in our hallway is not doing it's job properly. Neither is the spider that lives in my room.

Finals Suck

Well, just the anatomy final. It was like being ass raped sans Vaseline. Ironically it was on the intestines.

X-mas Wish List

Anything from this site will suffice. I prefer a non-used part; I don't know how abusive previous owners were.

Sunday, December 14, 2003

Adam and Steve

Although the big news item right now is the capture of Saddam Hussein, I think that topic is a bit overrun with discussion. I'd like to focus on gay marriage as my news item today.

First, the subject of homosexual marriage must be looked at from one of two angles: union of God or civil union.

If it is to be viewed as a union of God (where the idea of a bond between man and woman ONLY has roots), then the government should have no say in what goes on because there is a thing called separation of church and state. The government is not allowed to tell the country how to worship or uphold religious beliefs as a way of law regarding the civil union of two people who may be very much in love. To those who have religious convictions about this, you do not have to be involved, you are not a part of the marriage. Marriage, in the courts' eyes is a civil union and religion may or may not be a part of it. Furthermore, not allowing homosexual marriages forces them to commit another sin, sex outside of wedlock by not allowing the union. Many heterosexuals engage in this act, too, but it is still a sin in many religions.
If marriage is to be viewed as a civil union, then the courts have control, but they are discriminating against homosexuals. Homosexuals have no less love in their relationships than heterosexual relationships. Giving tax cuts and benefits to married couples and not allowing homosexual marriage is and outright and blatant attack on a group of people. Not allowing homosexual marriage is discriminating against a group of people, downgrading their rights and human beings.
On a personal note, I feel that when two people have decided to spend the rest of their lives together they have every right to announce it to the world, confirm it within the courts, and celebrate. Whether or not homosexuals are allowed a religious ceremony is up to the church, not the courts. Bush's proposed ideal "protection" of marriage would have all women as baby-makers and stay at home moms, while the men brings in the dough. I am not a baby-maker.

Friday, December 12, 2003

So Pink

I was smelling this perfume Milk gave me before she left and I realized I really like the Gap scent "So Pink". It just makes me happy. Do you have a favorite Gap scent?

Thursday, December 11, 2003

Splashdown-asm

In case you saw it at my Sister's site and thought you could live without it, or you are just now happening upon this information you need to download the Splashdown Blueshift CD. It was never released, nor will it so it is perfectly legal to get it in this fashion. It is one you really should get. "All Things" and "Sugar High" are just like having a Splashdown-asm in the privacy of your own computer.

Wednesday, December 10, 2003

Glow In the Dark Is Fun

RS says, "I want light up shoes." I go looking for them and I find Glow Shoes! The trick is the chemical glow sticks or LED battery lights put in the soles. It's going to be his birthday present because I already know what he is getting for X-mas. If any one needs a Christmas or Birthday idea for me, I really like the Soul Radiance shoe or maybe some lights for the shoes....

Hot Topic Blues

Hot Topic Blues
Here is my gripe of today: I dislike shopping at Hot Topic because I hate dealing with the Hot Topic crew. Maybe I have had bad experiences with the Hot Topic crew, but they all act to me like they are SO original and if you walk in not totally decked out all in one style, you are a poser and not really rebellious. They bash on people for conforming by buying clothes at other stores, but aren't the people who only shop at Hot Topic conforming also by labeling themselves? On the Hot Topic website, you will notice a little quick thing that lets you choose your "scene" and then the only clothes that are shown are those associated with that genre of music. They are, in essence, telling you what Punks should wear and what Indie kids should wear. They are doing the same thing that Abercrombie and Fitch does and saying they are trying to make every one an individual. Also, whenever I walk in, the crew tends to not help me or even gives me dirty looks (mostly the girls with a gazillion an one ear and nose piercings). Right, because I normally cover up my tattoos and piercings, am smiling, have hair of relatively normal color, and am not decked out in all Hot Topic merchandise I am not an original and do not deserve to be in that store. Like I said, maybe I have just had bad Hot Topic experiences, but the complete hypocrisy of the store makes me want to avoid going in there. My curse is I like their pants. I can't win.

*I did have one friend on the Hot Topic crew in JC. His name was Dallas and I met him in the Culp. The girl he was sitting with on this particular day also worked at Hot Topic in JC and gave me dirty looks like I was nothing more than a stupid little piece of trash.

Tuesday, December 09, 2003

ARGH!!

No more blogs until I get this stupid angiogenisis paper done.

Monday, December 08, 2003

Boys Are SOOO Silly

This guy at the cafeteria put sour cream on his burger, thinking it was mayonnaise. He said, "I wonder if they [cafeteria workers] know it's not mayonnaise." Then he went and complained. We were having quesadillas that night.

Let Us Be Free

I found this great site all about consumer freedom. These people have researched different organizations and exposed many for what they really are- radical groups who put a friendly public face on to collect funds. I originally went to this site because, to put it lightly, I HATE PETA!!! I could go on forever about them, but my main beef is that they are a radical organization devoted to making all animals "free", even those that depend on human care (some varieties of domesticated animals), and disregard for aimal and human welfare in the process. Anyways, the site also has some VERY interesting insights in to the Adbusters campaign (carol ann's fave.), MADD, and the Center for Food Safety.

Honey, Would You Like a Steak?

Ok, so I was looking for pictures of anorexic and bulimic chicks for my presentation for ethics. I have a bit on eating disorders. I never knew how badly some of these chicks get. I mean, I didn't think you could get that thin. I found these on pro-ana/pro-mia sites. I'll provide a link to one, you can decide if you REALLY want to go and look at more.

Eloise

Eloise, the cafeteria lady, is my hero. She makes my day better when she says, "Hello, you want take-out today?" and swipes my card. I don't know how she does it, but she just does.

Saturday, December 06, 2003

YAY!!

The more and more I look at it, the more and more I am psyched about the new Harry Potter movie. That's all I have to say.

PETA Sucks

While I have nothing against various organizations demonstrating their beliefs I have a problem with animal rights activists who feel the need to "liberate" animals without consideration of the consequences. For example, I came across an article about Rightists feeding pork to sheep. They did it so the sheep would not be sent to Kuwait.

"The move left 1,800 sheep unsuitable for export to Islamic buyers in Kuwait because pork, and anything it comes into contact with, is considered unclean by Muslims, Victoria state's chief veterinary officer Hugh Millar said on Friday. "

Here is my problem with this: The activists may have achieved their goal by not exporting these live animals, but just replaced one harm with another. Sheep digest food basically through fermentation and are herbivorous. Feeding a sheep meat messes up their digestive system because meat is not the best at fermenting. I also find it ironic that these Rightists fed the sheep and animal product indicating they believe the pigs life is not as valuable as the sheep. Pigs raised for meat are not housed in the best of conditions. In fact, the conditions are much like those a sheep would encounter during shipping.

Thursday, December 04, 2003

I Wonder

Is it kosher to put what you really think about people on Christmas cards? For example "To my socially inept cousin" or "To my whiny bitch ass *hopefully not for long* uncle" Is that ok?

Wednesday, December 03, 2003

ShitFuckDamn

I got my pictures back from TX. Unfortunately, my Advantix camera had switched to PANORAMIC and I just didn't bother to notice. Fortunately, I can get my prints developed in the standard format even though they were originally printed panoramic because the advantix film lets you do that. Unfortunately I wasted all that $$ on the pictures and I'm sure reprints are not the cheapest.

NO MAS!

I want to know when my final exam times are. All of my professors except one put the final exam time and place on the syllabus. ONE prof did not. I want to know when the exam is. That's reasonable, isn't it? He told me to look on the web. I did. I got this page. Notice anything?? That's right. They assign an EXAM SYMBOL for each class time. Now I that I know my exam time SYMBOLS I shoulc be able to find the exam times, right? WRONG!! I still have no clue, and I have seen just bout every ding dong dang site associated with UHM. I'm about pissed and I still don't know when my exam is.

Monday, December 01, 2003

RAIN!

It's raining so much the water is up to my ankles. No joke.

Thanksgiving week:

Sat. ~ Arrive, check in to hotel because RS doesn't want to expose me to his dad and brother yet. Run into his sister at dinner and spent the day with her.

Sun.~ Didn't do much except sit around, watch movies, sleep, eat, and make fun of the people next door having loud sex for about an hour. Watched National Lampoon's Thanksgiving Reunion, a Janis Joplin special, and a Jimi Hendrix special.

Mon.~ Get picked up by RS's sister and head towards RS's dad's apartment. Spend the day watching movies and drinking coffee.

Tues. ~ Went to the Nasher Sculpture Museum, Victoria's Secret Flagship store (with RS's Sister), and got really bad service at the Cheesecake factory. Stayed at RS's sister's house.

Wed. ~ *highlight* JR and Future Mrs. JR came over. Not so sure about her being future Mrs., so I will revert to Milk for blog sake.

T-day ~ wow. RS's family is weird. His brother-in-law's mother started talking about how she wanted grandchildren because she was getting old (65) and tried hooking me up with her other son the whole day. I wanted to scream "You crazy bitch leave me alone!" but instead I had to sit next to her. I like RS's mom though. She's on a permanent acid trip (I think).

Fri.~ Went and met the rest of RS's friends and got tattoos (little small bird with rose). Stayed up all night talking before he took me to the airport.

Been depressed because of 3 reasons:
1. I am not with RS
2. I was reminded how much Hawaii sucks by going and spending time in a place I like with people I like and being able to talk to my friends.
3. It has been raining non-stop since I got here (hence the water p to my ankles) and is just not weather conducive to a happy disposition.

Sunday, November 30, 2003

Sigh

Not happy, not happy. I hate living here so much. 3 weeks till I go home. Why do I hate this place so much? I am stuck. There is no going to somebody's house on long weekends or having a halfway normal life. I'm all depresed though because I just spent the week with my awsome boyfriend and his wonderful family and now I am back in hell and it is raining. Poo. I really want a cat right now, but, alas, all I have is sheep. I could find a dog, too. Everybody here is a dog person. No no, I want a kitty. The week was pretty entertaining and I wil tell all when I am not so sad.

Wednesday, November 19, 2003

Holidays

Sorry you haven't been getting exhilarating updates from Hawaii recently, but I have about a zillion and one things to do before I leave and have gotten about 10 done. I will be in Texas the week of Thanksgiving spending holidays with RS and his family. I am meeting his parents for the first time. I'll be back on the 29th and will tell all about it. I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday. Any special plans?

Good Thanksgiving movie- Pieces of April

PS~ Ghani, do they celebrate T-day over there? You could always start explanations with "When you guys persecuted those of different religions and sent over your unwanted people to die in the new land, and before they killed all the natives and stole their land..."

Saturday, November 15, 2003

WAY Too Funny

What is more disturbing than bacon loincloths? Rubber themes! Or how about your mom stripping at your birthday party? According to reports, her son was embarassed.

Friday, November 14, 2003

One More Time Waster

Catch up on your dead baby jokes.

Q: How do you make a dead baby float?
A: Two scoops of ice cream, one scoop of dead baby.

Ah... Mindlessness

Once again the internet has provided me with countless was to avoid my homework. Everything from making tampons into angels to making fake obituaries. If that isn't enough time wasting, then how about ordering new breath spray or joining the fight against clown porn?? If that still isn't enough, just find out what serial killer you are.

If i was a serial killer i would be Jack the Ripper.

Jack the Ripper, by far the most notorious killer of all time. What would drive a man to kill 5 prostitutes, surgically mutilate the bodies, then stop, to never be heard from again? Most of the murders were pretty much the same, the victim had her throat cut and her abdomen exposed, the intestines were placed over her right shoulder and sometimes a kidney or even the heart had been removed.



Jack the Ripper's murders are still unsolved.



Thursday, November 13, 2003

I'm Afraid to Know

I was just reading the print on my diet orange soda from Safeway. It says, in largish print, SODA WITH OTHER NATURAL FLAVORS. I don't know what to make of it all. Is soda a natural flavor?

It Would Shame My Name

I went to the Reel Big Fish concert last night. Ska must be the hardest music that reaches over here because everyone decided to mosh to it. It wasn't like a circle mosh pit or anything. No, it was a few moshers dispersed in the entire crowd o you had to mosh whether you wanted to or not. It isn't even moshing music. They were all stoked about it afterwards. "OMG I moshed so hard to that song." or "That was a good mosh." were the common consensus among the exiting crowd. I want them to go to a PMK5 or a Manson concert and REALLY see what is moshing music. You can't listen to ska and mosh at the same time. I'm being redundant because I want to get my point across. Now, I was close to the front because, while I don't even like Reel Big Fish, I was going to have a good time. I was getting pushed around, too. I'm a big girl, I can hold my own, until I found they also didn't know the cardinal rule: if some one falls down, you pick them up. I fell. I then found myself with a 300+ lb. guy on top of my. One thought ran through my head: "I am NOT dying in a FUCKING mosh pit at a Reel Big Fish concert". I would have been SO embarrassed. I am kind of embarrassed I even went.

Monday, November 10, 2003

Riiiiiiiiiiiiight.....

I had a weird dream that I was wearing black pants with letter of the alphabet on it. The strange part was I had a penis. The stranger part was it was pierced. The strangest part was that I still had my female parts and neither myself nor anybody else thought this was weird in the least.
I finished my paper on how a rhesus monkey fetus lung develops!!! YAY!

Papaya Stem Makes a Good Pipe

Saturday I went to help build this structure for the people in the people volcano to stand on. The people volcano is made of several models, climbing on this thing, who are then covered in a sheet soaked in quick drying plaster. I am one of the models for this. I was chosen, well, because I have a big ass. Anyways, I went to the garden where we were putting this thing together. One of the other models and I went and got starfruit and coconut from the garden for breakfast and lunch. There were about eight people there working and we had "such positive energy" according to Brotha Joe. There was a lesbian couple there (one did not shave armpits), a really tall skinny guy named Dark who brought his daughter, Brotha Joe who is the man with the vision, the model who went with me to get fruit, and a professor in the art department. At around 1 PM, some one went and got beer, and somebody else went into the garden and picked a papaya stem off of the tree. Apparently, putting a small rock in the papaya stem acts as a little screen while letting smoke go around it. If you smoke it at night, you can see the glow of any hot ashes that may have escaped. This is also apparently common knowledge among real islanders. It reminded me of the McGiver (sp?) smoker in Half Baked. "I need an avocado, a snorkel......."

Lesson of the day:
Papaya stem makes a good weed pipe.

*Note: I did not participate in any chemical activities. Not my bag, not even beer with surgery later and around people I don't know.*

Friday, November 07, 2003

One Day It Will Hurt

I want to take this moment to talk about chairs. Specifically, I want to talk about my chair this LOVELY university provides me with. We will ignore the stiky stain on the apholstery for right now and talk about the mechanics of it. It is designed to "prevent" people from falling out by rocking slightly back and stopping due to flat dents on the rocker part. This is complete crap. If you so happen to put any sudden pressure on it, say in popping your back, you will fall backwards....in slow motion. I do this on a daily basis. They are trying to kill us here- first fattening us up- and then trying to kill us.

Do You Know...

...seeing an Asian midget on a tiny scooter right after chemistry is the funniest shit ever?
...skipping one class allows for millions of productive things to be done because the offices on campus hold crap hours?
...a fleace blanket makes an excellent cape?
...if you curl in the fetal position and tell people to stop and go away, they laugh at you?
...vegan black bean soup/chili with rice and cheese is the best thing our cafteria serves?
...the baked potato lady is seriously attached to her bps and didn't want me to have one? She kept taking it back!
...Safeway's generic Dr. Pepper is called Dr. Skippy?

Wednesday, November 05, 2003

I Like the Angel of Death

I found a nifty game where you are God and you have gotten angry at all the living beings. You must destroy as many as possible with your automatic lighting bolts and your new weapons; you get a new one on each level. I got to level 5 and decided I needed to go to bed. I like the little game while the real game is loading, too.

I'm Sure It TRIED To Piss On Me

I have a question for all you dog owners who go to college or owned a dog while in college: Did you take your dog to class and let it run around and sniff people like it would just LOVE to piss on their shit? No? Tell that to the chick in my class who brought her dog to class and let it run around and sniff people like it would just LOVE to piss on their shit. Yes, I understand we are mostly animal science majors and I understand it is an animal ethics course, but chick could have just brought in a picture or something. Let me just make something common knowledge- I don't like dogs. I love animals. I do, really. I would not clean up sheep shit and hand feed the little ones if I didn't like animals a whole lot, but I don't like dogs. I especially don't like dogs coming over and sniffing my backpack like it is great fun to find new territory. I wonder how chick would like it if I brought my cat in to vomit and scratch up her stuff. Maybe I'll try it next week.

Sunday, November 02, 2003

It Smelled Like Sweaty Guy, Cigarettes, and Liquor

So now I am 100% sober and have viewed video (yes, it is on tape) of Halloween. I also had a miniature party last night so here is a chronological order of momentous events of the past two days.
Halloween:
1. Got shit faced and started calling everybody on my call list. Only one of my friends and my sister answered.
2. Walked to the bus stop and got a glowstick from some chick named Kendra. Mine was orange, but I stole a drunk army guy's blue one.
3. Pissed in the bushes of a bank with exceptionally thick foliage.
4. Bought cigarettes.
5. Walked around Waikiki and wrote drunken cursive on some guy wearing a chalkboard.
6. Stopped at Taco Bell on the way back to campus.
7. Flashed some car to let us get over into their lane.
8. Walked in to see some guy running naked out of his room with a towel around his waist followed by another guy. He said, "Whoa, that was close, you almost saw the biggest dick on the island." I said, "I doubt it." He said, "Oh really, want to see?" and showed it to me and the 3 girls I was with.

Last Night:
1. Drank a little bit, just buzzed for about 30 min.
2. Told RS some things I probably shouldn't have (2 weeks and 5 days till we see each other!)
3. Listened to RS's Halloween night. Apparently he humped a plastic Frankenstien, made out with a keg, licked beer off the floor because he was spilling it, and jumped into the pool fully clothed.
4. Saw the guy who showed me his dick. I said, "NICE DICK!" He said, "Yeah right , you never saw it." I told him that he did the night before. He didn't remember what he did the night before.
5. Saw the video of Halloween with me asking how big everybody's penis is and yelling at them until they answer me.
6. Had 3 Army guys dress in my dresses.
7. Came back from watching a movie to find a sweaty, smelly Army guy on my bed.
8. Kicked him out of my bed, made him sleep on the floor on my comforter, sprayed my bed with body splash, and slept on the side farthest away from where he was.
9. Did laundry this morning. Washed all my sheets, including my comforter.

Saturday, November 01, 2003

halloween

So I ahve 3 halodays when I say to yself..."self, you need to get drunk". today is one of those. halloween. expect similar posts on new years, groundhogs day and he fourth of july.. that's four hoidays. nevermind. i dressed as a cheerleader tonight and got showed a penis from the guy on the first floor. I like waikiki. All sorts of dun shit here. updaste will come when sobriety has been resitableshd. ok. byebye!

Tuesday, October 28, 2003

What was it?

I was just sitting at my desk, studying for anatomy, when all of a sudden I smell this truly wretched smell. I thought it might have been some random new addition in out room seeping up trough the floor boards or the room next door had been changed into a morgue for the SEVERELY decomposed. I started sniffing around our room to find the smell and the scent took me out to the hallway. The smell was more accurately a tuna-shit smell. It smelled like some one took a big can of rotten tuna and a pound of really raunchy shit and cooked it in a big pot. As I got closer to the bathroom the smell made me want to vomit. It was so strong I had to turn around and go back to my room. She must have been saving up that shit all day while eating curry to land a shit that stinky. Either that or it was a stinky shit mixed with a really nasty infection.

Why Am I So Gay?

I found out from The Spark's Gay test, I am 56% gay. I took it as a straight girl and a lesbian. The average for a straight woman is 32% gay and the average for a lesian is 45% gay. I'm more lesbian than a lesbian. Why am I so gay? Is it because the Chinese Hairdresser shaved part of my head?

I also found out from The Spark's Sex Test that I am 62% sexy and that I will have sex with 56 people in my life time and will love three of them. 27 of these partners will be female. WHY AM I SO GAY?

They Really Aren't All That Cuddly

I got to pet a white rhino yesterday. Despite what you may think, they really are not all that petable. They like to be scratched behind their ears and to eat apples. I also got to drive a 7 passenger van to and from the zoo.

Monday, October 27, 2003

More Shorter?

I'd just like every one to be glad they live in an area where their hairdresser speaks they same language they do. It is really hard to convey your hair style in English to a Chinese lady who says "More shorter? Really Shorter?" when you talk to her. She didn't pick up on what I wanted until halfway through so my hair looks like a cross between my normal cut and a shaved monkey.

Friday, October 24, 2003

GROSS STORY ALERT!!

So I was in anatomy lab looking for all these blood vessels. Mr. T and I were looking for the testicular vein, the main one, and we had just picked up the guts to find it. We moved them aside and saw it.

He said, "Is that you testicular whatever?", and then dropped the piece of tissue back over it so I couldn't see.

I said, "Move it over again, pull it. Can you pull it?"

So he pulled it and a big mess of fat and dead sheep gut juice splashed in my face and all up in my eyes. I couldn't see so I took off my gloves and put them in the trash can and had somebody help me to the sink to rinse out my eyes while the entire class was laughing at me. I was laughing too so it was ok. I'm kind of glad it was me because I really didn't feel like cleaning up somebody's puke and most people in my class would have puked in that situation, but it really sucked that I got this shit in my eyes.

The moral is, never say "pull it" in anatomy lab.

Hmmm...

I took this drinky quiz and found I am a tall glass of beer, but I am having difficulty finding a good place for it on here....any suggestions? I need html code for it too, because I had a tendency to skip tech 1 and go get body piercings or tattoos; I don't remember jack shit.

Thursday, October 23, 2003

FYI

For those who don't know:
Ohana means family.
Oof means scrump, lay, boink, bone, whatever.
Haole is a sometimes derogatory term for a mainlander.
Shi-shi means piss, both verb and noun.
Dolphins have hinged penises (peni? Which is correct?)
RS has a sweet tooth equivalent to mine (we'll be diabetics together some day).
Blogger spell check sucks.
Spell check doesn't recognize Hawaiian words.
I need Mexican food...VERY BADLY!

Scottish Sex

An Excerpt from Ghani's Blog:

"Things I'm learning from my neighbors upstairs:
After five minutes of loud, moaning sex (good job there, stud), the best thing to do is rearrange your furniture and start hammering at something on the wall. Or the floor. Then, start uncontrollably sobbing at the top of your lungs."


I heard this last night at the beginning of my drinking spree. It was shortened, only about 30 sec. of the loud sex followed by a fairly long period of furniture rearranging. The sobbing was barely audible because the room this was coming from was down the hall and up a floor.

Will You Still Respect Me in the Morning?

Have you ever woken up and wondered two things:
1. Where am I?
2. What did I do last night?
That is what I was thinking this morning along with "How did I get so drunk?"
The answers to these questions are (in order of remembrance):
1. I am on the floor in one of the apartments with the girl across the hall.
2. I got really drunk celebrating this guy's birthday when I don't know the guy.
3. On top of my four beers, I finished off about 5 40s.

I think finishing off other people's beer is like eating food off of other people's plates. In the food sense, you don't realize you are eating so much until you end up fat. In the drink sense, you don't realize you are drinking so much until you end up drunk.

Monday, October 20, 2003

In Hawaii...

...the best time to empty the two large dumpsters in front of my window is at 5:45 am. This works best if done as noisily as possible. The more people you wake up, the better your job was done.

...1.5 hours is too short of a time to make up a test you have already taken. This is especially true if the test is made of exactly the same questions.

...when you don't need on AOL you can get on, but when it thinks you are doing something important, like replying to your sister's email, it will kick you off. (look in the Mexican or hot sauce aisle, sister)

...the time difference sucks.

...it is likely you will get threatened, beat up, or picked on if you are white.

...cheese throwing at 2 am is a sport. If you get it all the way down the hall, leaving chunks behind, and get one chunk in the bathroom, you are a champ.

...the excuse for every sexual act, shameful or not, is "I was drunk."

...the excuse "I don't want to drink" is not acceptable.

...there are funny trees that cause allergic reactions on EVERYBODY.

...if you weigh over 100 lbs, you look like a heffer.

...people will make fun of you if boys always cat-call you. They tend to blame it on your boobs, but you blame it on the boys. No, the boobs were asking for it.

...the proper way to say hello at 3 am is to honk your car/moped/bicycle horn for a full minute.

...to get your point across or to make a valid statement you must say "like" 5 times in each sentence and follow the whole statement up with "yeah", e.g. "Sorry, yeah. Thought it was you."

...Coke is a rare product. If you don't like drinking Pepsi, you are SOL.

...there is an ice epidemic, and I don't mean there is a frozen water epidemic.

...you can't walk across the street without stepping on 25 feral cats.

Sunday, October 19, 2003

I'm Not an Ax Murderer; I Just Play One on TV

Friday night we saw the Texas Chainsaw Massacre. If you like movies with plot, I would not recommend this movie. I mean, she is on the highway but decides she would be safer in the meat factory. JEEZ! The whole night was frustrating. I was with my friend's friends and they acted just like I did when I was 16. That's right, we stood around for the good majority of the night in parking lots discussing what we were going to do. That and they seemed to have no concept of the consequences of their actions. I, on the other hand, had to be up early and go to surgery. This other girl had to be at work at the same time but said she wasn't going to go...again. She also said she would take my friend home on Sunday to do laundry is she wasn't too hungover. We finally all got into cars except two guys who said "What are we doing?" and the whole thing started again. I got so fed up with it at the end of the night I screamed, "FUCKING ISLANDERS, MAKE UP YOUR DAMN MINDS!" They made up their minds real quick, but probably never want to see me ever again. Oh well.

Saturday, while doing a jugular catheter on the ewe I was holding, the graduate student went straight through the vein. That's ok, just roll the sheep over. The jugular vein bleeds a lot and I got blood all over my leg. I got a lot of funny looks coming into my dorm. You would think these people have never seen a mild mannered George walk into the dorm with a massive amount of blood on their shorts and socks. What is with these people?

Thursday, October 16, 2003

FACIAL HAIR ADVANCE!!

Jesus sat in front of me today with his laptop playing some ninja game and getting visibly upset when he didn't make it to the next level. He also has a shirt on promoting the Organization for the Advancement of Facial Hair (OAFH).

I also had a weird dream about surfing, but I woke up and decided I need a surface piercing on my back.

Wednesday, October 15, 2003

Tourists, Blech

I don't like Japanese tourists. They are like cockroaches here: they are every where, you can't get rid of them, and they are four feet tall. It is even the rainy season here. Let me tell you something about the rainy season here, IT SUCKS! It is like a bathroom sink faucet in the dorms. It gets turned on for either short or long periods of time, usually on full, gets turned off within a few minutes at the longest, and can be used again 30 seconds later or 30 minutes later. I have also noticed the national weather service doesn't even predict rain here. Everyday we are supposed to get no precipitation. I don't even think they look at the satellite and just assume we people in Hawaii know what the weather is like.

Sister, could you send me more yummy refreshments in the form of nothing coconut nor dark? Do you want macadamia nuts? They are on sale (all flavors) so just let me know if you have a hankering.

Monday, October 13, 2003

2 Questions

2 Questions for those who might know:

How often is it that your teacher doesn't show up for class? Mine didn't today and I think I am just lucky (we don't get Colombus Day off).

Why doesn't my computer recognize CDs that are blue on the bottom?

Saturday, October 11, 2003

I ROCK!!!

I got the blood and iodine stains out of my surgery pants with out a pre-soak option on my machine. I ROCK AT LAUNDRY!!!

Somebody spilt their milk in the cafeteria tonight and then some one else came along, slipped, and spilled their shit. Chain reaction right by our table.

I'll Show You an Alarming Look At a Teenager

Friday night, Roomie and I went to see Thirteen at the Wallace Theaters (indie films only). It was a mutal agreement that we wanted THIS movie. After I vented some of the anger the movie caused me, I took time to reflect on it.

The movie is about a girl going into 7th grade. She is not ugly or anything, but is a little unpopular and is of course having all sorts of teenage angst. This angst is probably accentuated by the fact her divorced mom is dating a coke head and they and the girl's brother barely get by and the dad is just too busy to see his kids or take them on his weekends. She starts hanging out with this really popular girl and enters into a life of theft, sex, drugs (hardcore), rebellion, and moderate prostitution. All of this when she is in the 7th grade. Eventually, it gets so bad she is held back in the 7th grade and her mom finds all of her stuff because she has been semi-oblivious throughout this whole spiral.

I won't spoil the ending in case you want to see it because, despite the far-fetchedness of it all, it is a good movie. I say far fetched because I didn't know about most of this stuff until I was a freshman or sophomore in high-school. I knew some people who were never teenagers and virgins at the same time, but never this out of control in any manner. Rooie also never encountered people like this and she grew up in the city the movie takes place. There are a lot of reviews which call this movie an "alarming but realistic view into today's teenager's life". BULLSHIT! Speaking as a teenager today, I would like to point out I never crushed up perscription pill and snorted them through a straw or sold weed in the park, especially in the 7th grade.

On that note, I would like to mention that I did notice prior to the movie a large group of 12 or 13 year olds getting on the bus dressed in clothes I wouldn't be caught at a club in for the sake of being skanky giving the bus driver an attitude.

I'll leave it at that. I highly recommend this movie, but it might make you a little angry. It made me angry.

Thursday, October 09, 2003

UPDATE!

Jesus broke his arm.

RS got my package.

I got my sister's package with tasty liquid mood altering refreshments, Mardi Gras beads, Flinstone (TM) vitamins (I am almost all out of my Jimmy Neutron [TM] vitamins), Luna (TM) bars, and some papers I wanted from her. THANKS SISTER!!!!

I got a letter from the youth director at church telling me I was in their prayers even though I never went to youth or even my own church for the last year I was in JC because they were a bunch of spoiled, stuck-up, snobby, bitchy pricks. I got along with about 5 of the people in my youth group out of around 60+ yeah, thanks. Doesn't it not work to pray for some one already in Hell?

Learned the meaning of the word "kickback" in a noun sense from Roomie. It means a small party with about 5-10 people where you just sit and chill.

Please God, NO!

Arnold as president??

Arnold on AOL

I think he may even get redneck votes because he's not a girly man. Oh lord, please help this nation see through its stupidity!

Tuesday, October 07, 2003

It Is a Sad Situation

I made the highest grade in the class on my most recent anatomy test. I got a 64. A 60 is passing. 11 out of 15 failed.

Just shoot me now.

AHNOLD!!

It was the men. Direct quote from my roommate who is from LA: "California is so fucking stupid! It was just a bunch of people thinking it was funny to elect him. I am so pissed off right now, I can't even talk about it"

Ahnold in office, baby.

"Despite recent reports that Schwarzenegger, 56, allegedly groped and sexually harassed at least 15 women, CNN exit polls showed that roughly 47 percent of female voters backed the Austrian-born actor. Men voted heavily for Schwarzenegger, according to these exit polls."

Does it bother anybody else that California's Governer has an action figure made of him?

Monday, October 06, 2003

Bad Me

I skipped out on going to the pig slaughterhouse today for 3 reasons:

1. I was slightly hungover from getting slightly buzzed the night before at the beach on the rocks (ok, so there are good points to Hawaii)

2. I had an Economics test to study for and a Rotaract meeting to go to.

3. I figure I'm the only person in the class that has ever euthanized and animal and that makes me exempt.

Edited to say: One more reason is that after my extensive handling of sheep in a semi-greusome manner, I can no longer eat lamb on the bone. I do not want my pork chops, pork ribs, or other pig on the bone tasty meats taken away from me.

Christmas Time in October

I love my mother.
Today I received one (1) larger box containing one (1) large box of brownies and cookies with the little m&ms in them, one (1) pair of Halloween socks, one (1) McDonald's toy with Ronald leaning against a glow in the dark star, one (1) box of hot chocolate (the good kind), one (1) happy meal toy spinner, one (1) bag of candied ginger, one (1) bag of ginger candy (there is a difference), one (1) bag of five (5) chocolate squares, one (1) box of Girl Scout Cookies, one (1) can of Moravian sugar cookies, one (1) personal hand-held fan, one (1) bag of plasticware, one (1) bag of clothes pins, two (2) Shout wipes, one (1) Girl Scout "Leader", one (1) box of tea, and some mail that I REALLY did want. There might have been something else. She sent me a bunch of sweets, and a note that my taxes will be arriving in a separate envelope.

NOTE: Blogger does recognize McDonald's and will correct you if you don't spell it right.

Sunday, October 05, 2003

Did you know...

Did you know:

The average person produces about 12,000 gallons of urine over the course of their lifetime? (unless you are the Future Mrs. JR, who pees 5x as much as everybody else)

Anthropologists know of no human society whose children do not play hide and seek?

"Polyiterophilia" is the inability to have an orgasm with one partner unless first engaging in sex acts with many others?

A cat can jump five times as high as it is tall?

One third of all German children are on some sort of medication?

The average nipple size is 0.27 inches for women and 0.22 for men?

There is a picture of a naked breast with a nipple piercing on this page?

Bus Luck

Roomie and I were waiting at the bus stop, with about 6 other people, and we see our bus come, so we stand at the sign, and the us comes, slows down, the driver looks at us, slows almost to a stop, and just keeps on going. We had to wait 30 min for the next one. We are both writing strong letters of unhappiness to the company. This was right after our conversation about how us mainlanders are always discriminated against in Hawaii.

On the bus ride back, there was this chick in the back of the bus with balloons and a gathering of other girls telling her how well she sand while she was belting out off pitch, out of tune, Mariah Carey songs. We were sitting next to the driver and he said (not over the intercom) "Brittany Spears, take it easy back there".

Friday, October 03, 2003

Are You Claustrophobic?

I was all sweaty and smelling like dead animal, drinking milk by the grocery between muscle dissection and putting jugular catheters in four ewes, and some guy from the art department comes up to me and asks me if I would like to model in the art department in an upcoming sculpture. He was VERY animated about this sculpture, but it involves me getting propped, standing with about 9 other people on a bamboo structure, and having a sheet soaked in plaster thrown on top of us. I think I will call him back about it. It sounds really cool. Even if the sculpture doesn't go anywhere I can always say I did it.

Ode To The Rain

What the hell is this stuff outside?
It's wet and on it reflections seem to glide.
You must be the rain I prayed for for the last 90 days
When my whole world was in a muggy, non-windy haze.

Alas, my room does not have air conditioning
So we depend on the whole wind and rain thing
To keep us cool
When we aren't at school.

I love you rain, my best friend
To the disgruntled dormer you do tend
And temperatures and tempers seem to cool
Especially mine as I'm listening to Tool.

Thursday, October 02, 2003

Update

Jesus shaved his moustache, but kept his beard.

My anatomy professor called me in his office to tell me I was doing badly in that class as if I didn't know already.

Apparently I have to have good reason for not wanting to get drunk.

The bitches next door have aquired a hammer. And tribal music.

So Yeah, Like, Totally

So I'm sitting in Evironmental Economics and this is the coversation between the professor and this chick.

Professor: I mean, does any one here really stay awake at night because they are thinking about landfill problems? How many people care enough about the big fire in central Illinios that they can't sleep?

Chick: I do.

Prof: Really? Are you from there?

Chick: No, but I've been there.

I even saw the professor roll her eyes.

Wednesday, October 01, 2003

Why...

WHY:
Are the bitches next door compelled to play their annoying teenie-bopper music at top volume so it is louder than MY music when my head phones are on, and the driven further to start singing at the top of their little Samoan lungs about 5 keys off and fluctuating between flat and sharp? O god why won't they shut up??? My left eyeball is going to pop a blood vessel.

Do the bitches next door never take out their trash and the bugs the attract fly into our room when the door is open?

Do the bitches next door bring boys over to have loud, moany, bumpy, screamy sex at all hours of the day?

Do the bitches next door have loud, moany, bumpy, screamy sex to their loud teenie-bopper music?

Is there always some chick in the bathroom puking?

Is my new lab partner a pussy and can do any physical part in the experiment after he gets a 1st degree burn on an extremely small area of his pinky on his left hand and makes me do all the work?

Are you still reading this?

A Fairy Tale Wedding

Did you know the have weddings in space?

"In August, Russian cosmonaut Yuri Malenchenko caused a stir when he married Texas resident Ekaterina Dmitriev as he orbited 240 miles above the Earth. The ceremony was held in Texas, which allows weddings in which one of the parties is not present. "

I just want to know how that works, having a wedding when one of the parties is not present.

Tuesday, September 30, 2003

I Wasn't a Witness

Apparently, according to wide mass campus talk, Nick Carter was at he UH Manoa Cafeteria last night. I didn't see him, but we ate early and we were told later that night after we ate that he was there at that moment. It makes sense because American Idol had their little try-out beginning season show last night right here, in Honolulu, the bum-fuck large city of the USA.

Rumor also has it Mr. Carter is fat.

Now, if you had somehow made oodles and boodles of money by being a blond headed male bimbo with no talent, would YOU be at MY school cafeteria? That would be the last place I would be. Unless, of course, I was looking for a piece of ass from a bulimia-goddess eating "just a salad" or wanting to get my ass kicked from the girls like me and my two (2) friends and all the non-gay boys (and the queer ones who are like me and my two [2] friends). If I was trying to pick up a skanky ho, however, I would sit on the front steps of my dorm because, for the exception on the bathroom side of the right third floor, a bunch of skanky hos live here. Most of the skanky hos stay out side looking to pick up a piece ass. A piece of ass like the fat blond Backstreet Boy who needs to make his money by telling the stupid people who think they can sing (like them bitches next door) that they can't on national television.

This goes to show that not only does Nick Carter have no talent but no logic as well. Like a younger, fatter, more annoying, whiny, slutty, blond, American Simon. And fuck American Idol.

Wouldn't It Be Nice If....

Wouldn't it be nice if:
My anatomy test was easier than I thought it would be?
I had a whole bunch of super yummy green tea?
That super yummy green tea ws cheaper than the name-brand kind?
I had a super-duper cool boyfriend who called me to tell me he was extra in love with me today? *cue for sister to vomit*
I had a turbo fan which blows lots of extra-windy wind?
.Ketchup made a good, cheap, tomato flavored lube?
I find my roommate likes Tool?
I skipped the pre-vet meeting?

I did all of these or had all of these things happen (I just read about the ketchup) within the past 24 hours. It's the simple things in life.

yum

I like tea. I like tea a lot.

Wind

I got a new fan that is better quality and more powerful than the last. It was cheaper because my friends had better sense than the stinky prof. and took me to Sears and not the Japanese import store. Because everything the Japanese import from France is guaranteed to be better. Right. I'm going to be crass, mine is a CHINESE made fan from an AMERICAN company that I bought at an AMERICAN store.

Not some damn French fan. They don't even need powerful fans in France.

Monday, September 29, 2003

They're Back!

The bus strike is over although it is more expensive, no transfer passes, and no student discounts. It sucks, kamianas get discounts, but students pay tourist rates. Like everything else here, it screws the students. This week only Mon-Fri is free rides. I just might ride around for the hell of it. I still have a few things to say about the bus people, but at least the giant machines are running.

Yup

Everyday I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days I've stayed alive.

I like that. It makes me happy.

Last night was cooler, but past 6:15 (around sunrise) it was unbearable to sleep any longer. I am getting a fan today (hopefully). A REAL fan from Sears. Mine was on sale at this Japanese supermarket and dripped oil or something from the mortor area the first night I used it. Stupid Freanch fan makers made me a defective fan.

Sunday, September 28, 2003

Addicted

In case you missed my latest drama, my fan broke. For those who have forgotten, we have no airconditioning in our dorm (or any dorms on campus for that matter). If you have a mental diability, let me drill this in; its fucking hot in Hawaii, even at night. The guy at the tattoo shop last night (only buying jewelry thats cheaper at this particular shop) thought I was on drugs because I had a sweatshirt on and was comfortable (he said "yeah, sure you're ok" with that i-wish-i-was-on-your-drugs look)

With that in mind, I can't stop drinking tea. It's like a snack in a cup and I am addicted. Green tea mostly, black tea in highly stresful situations, and herbal tea close to meal times (less filling) are my friends. Oh Goddess, why can't I stop?

What Happened to Brotherly Love

Last night Roomie and I went down to Waikiki and had dinner at TGI Fridays. I had steak and potatoes, she had a chicken sandwich, and we both had desserts. It was so much better than cafeteria food. We left a big tip. We went walking around and this old man was lying on his back outside of Banana Republic; he looked like he was trying to get up, and nobody was asking if he needed help. We discussed it, whether we should ask or not because we were also worried for our safety. While we were walking over to ask him if he needed help a man with work gloves in his back pocket went over and asked him if he was ok. He and a few other big guys helped him up, and one was checking him for any significant injuries. We felt kind of bad because when we were walking back there was an ambulance there, but we figured we would have been more in the way if we had tried to help him initially because we would not have been physically able to pull him up. The thing was nobody asked the man if he needed help and he was right next to a restaurant and a clothing store. He wasn't dressed oddly; he was in slacks and an aloha shirt. We saw quite a few people just walked around him and still nobody asked him. It made me sad that our regard for fellow human beings has declined so much. I felt guilty that we had to discuss with each other whether or not we should go over, and then sad that we even had to question our safety. I think I may have found another option for my path in life. My mom mentioned something about me being a good candidate for a Human Rights Lawyer. I could see myself doing that. I think I would also make a good Environmental Lawyer because of my aptitude for science and a real love for the planet. I think there are many things people and do, say, or are exposed to by other people or corporations that they just accept because it is not realizing it is not within their constitutional rights or the rights of others. I doubt many have read the US Constitution or thought about what it says. It seems that we tend to take things as they are. This girl in my anatomy class said she stopped eating meat at Thanksgiving when she was in the seventh grade because she realized what the turkey was. She told me she had always eaten meat and never really thought about the connection between the animal and the meat on the table, and when she did she didn’t want to eat meat anymore. Why should it be any different recognizing our fellow human beings as something that should have some respect?

Grrrrr....

My fan just quit working. Crap. It's hot. I wish we had air conditioning. I hate this place so much.

Saturday, September 27, 2003

Sheepy

This morning at bumfuck-thirty I went outside and smoked a cigarette while waiting for my ride to the Small Animal Facility. I was up so early, the drunk people with the guitar were still outside and made up songs about me. Really nice people, the drunks with the guitar. One of them sang this song he wrote and it was better than the crap on the radio.

Anyways, we took the one ewe and anesthetized her and took out a corpus luteu and 35 caruncles. Then we sewed her up and euthenized her. Right. I felt very wrong doin the whole ding-dong thing. I will stop there incase, by some freak accident, a word mangling animal rightist happens to read this site and twist the truth as they so often do. The ewe was no in any pain, but I just didn't like it all. I really am thinking about a new major.

Is it possible to feel your ass get fatter? I think mine just did.

Take Your Crap Outside

It says in our resident handbook to take out own trash out to the middle dumpster. It does not say "leave you trash in the hall right outside your door where it can stink and attract cockroaches and ants". I wish my nextdoor neighbors would figure that out.

PS~ This chick I know is taking applications for a man to do. Must shower, mst not annoy her, and must have past experience. Oh yes, you know who you are....I know all. Remember, for the most part we are watching the same channel......

Thursday, September 25, 2003

Paranoia Multiplies

My bank tells me I'm not authorized to use my debit card anymore, right when I'm trying to buy a plane ticket. I'm telling you, conspiracy in the 808.

Wednesday, September 24, 2003

Just F&@k

Got this in my email today.

"We will be doing one ewe (9828-110#-Day 16) on Saturday, September 27, 2003 and one ewe (01278-88#-Day 12) on Sunday, September 28, 2003. Yoshie, Drew, Georgia, and I will start at 5:00 A. M., the rest should be there by 6:00 A. M. on both days."

This means that at 5:00 AM I will be inserting a catheter into the uterine horn of a ewe to do testing. I bet I will be doing anesthesia because I am the only undergrad in that bunch. I'm also the only freshman in the class.

Just........F&@K!!!!

The irony of it is, we're just going to kill the sheep when the experiment is over.

Tuesday, September 23, 2003

The Karate Kid

I was listening to the hidden track on the "S.C.I.E.N.C.E." CD by Incubus (1997). There is this part with this guy (The Karate Kid) going "I HATE HAWAII! I HATE THIS PLACE! *fake mom voice* But you can't, it's Hawaii *end mom voice* I HATE IT! ALL I WANT TO DO IS LEAVE! I JUST WANT TO LEAVE!!" goes on like this for about a minute. Wow, I thought I was the only one.

And more

We get back from dinner and the new keys don't go in the lock on the door *mental scream*. I yelled very loud obcenities and threw my keys down the hallway.

Terrible Tuesday

7:30 am- Wake up, eyes bloodshot and swollen, massive headache
9:00 am- First class ok except my cold makes me sleepy and I have the only frickin' squeaky desk.
10:30 am- Take chem. test I didn't study for.
11:00 am- Try to print writing assignment for anatomy, but department likes to "recycle" old excess paper, so I have to borrow paper from the airhead at the middle computer.
1:05 pm- maintenance man comes to check new keys when I am late for class
1:30 pm- In animal ethics class.
2:50 pm- anatomy professor says my cold is from kissing boys. I flatly tell him my boyfriend lives in TX, thanks for rubbing it in.
3:00 pm- Find out I made a 58 on my anatomy test in the freezing room that made my titty hurt.
4:30 pm- Smoked cigarettes to make me feel better- ran out.
4:45 pm- Find out I need to return my key AGAIN and get a envelope full of bills.

I need to not be in HI right now.

Vegetarian?

I am never eating chicken again, or until I at least forget the video we watched in Animal Ethics. The sight of the chicks being "de-beaked" turned me off hot wings. Only organic free-range chicken for this chick. (punny, huh?) I won't go into the details of the rest of the early 1980s movie with the soundtrack of a codiene overdose/B horror movie from 1978.

Lesbian Night at the Cafeteria

Mahi Mahi, Seafood Chowder, Ahi salad, Teryaki Mahi Sandwhich....seeing a pattern? I ate a regular salad, rice, and what I thought was potato soup. It actually was-Tah-Dah!-SEAFOOD CHOWDER!!!! It looked, and tasted, like man chowder with big chunks of non-descript fake shellfish and regular grade-F fish meat (probably the heads from those ppor mahi mahi fish and ahi tuna).

Monday, September 22, 2003

Out of This Tiny Area

My prom date's brother, AR called me yesterday. This was after his mom made AD call me to see if giving AR in Oahu my number was ok. It was really nice to talk to somebody from home, especially out here. He's stationed out here for three years in the Air Force and has been here six months. I think we are going to see a movie on Saturday or something. He has a car so I could make it out of the campus area for a change.

Sunday, September 21, 2003

Great Balls of Fire

Roomie was doing an art project with ashes from burnt paper The fire got a little out of hand on one of them and I hear, "FIRE, OH-NO!!" and turn around to see her running down the hall with a giant ball of fire in her hand. There were big chunks of smoldering ash in the hallway and big pieces of burnt paper in the sink. Oddly enough, our paper fire in our room didn't set off the fire alarm, like the chick with the deodorant.

The Purple Dancing Monkey

The Roomie and I went out last night to see a movie at the Kahala Theater instead of going to that club. We saw "Cold Creek Manor" and all it did was kill brain cells. I knocked over our $2 box of junior mints and kept stepping in the mildly sticky candy the entire time in the movie. Only when we got outside did I notice a tricky chocolatey mint candy had fallen in my seat and was now on my pants. Kind of like the nachos when we saw "Finding Nemo". I should stop going to pee in the middle of movies. When we were walking out of the mall the movie theater is in, we saw the purple hanging monkey in KB Toystore clapping its feet and gyrating while making monkey noises. It was surreal to see this dancing purple monkey in the middle of a store that was closed in a deserted mall.
The cab rides were kind of interesting The cab driver on the way there didn't speak any spoken language on account of what sounded like a lack of teeth, but i got the part where he called me a redneck, and then laughed about it. I didn't like him after that. The cab driver on the way back spoke English well, talked to us about his adventures in college, and how life is circular like salmon, trying to make it upstream and when you get there all you do is spawn. Hmmmmmm......makes you think, doesn't it?

Saturday, September 20, 2003

Not About My Nipple

Maybe a little bit, it makes me so happy!!! I went to the RMH again this morning. Different work than before. This was more weeding than playing with big heavy logs, and they had hot dogs on the grill. They did not, however, have diced onions to go on the hot dogs.

Got word from a friend that he saw a video with a star that looked like me. I swear it wasn't me. That's my story and I'm sticking to it

The chick next door set off the fire alarm again with her aerosol deodorant. This make 3 times so far. I'd hate to see her with hairspray.

There is a new club opening tonight that Roomie and I are going to. The DJ from Linkin Park is supposed to be spinning the vinyl.

I have to mention how much I love RS. He is so wonderful.

I think that's it for today so far. My nipple makes me happy.

Friday, September 19, 2003

Letters

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht frist and lsat ltteer is at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae we do not raed ervey lteter by it slef but the wrod as a wlohe.



funny stuff

I Forgot My Vaseline

Yeah, that's right. I just got ass raped by my anatomy test. I must be walking funny because I forgot my Vaseline today.

Face the Music

Today is the day for the big test that I've been stressing over. wish me luck and large quantities of ice cream afterwards.

Thursday, September 18, 2003

Back to the 80s

I saw something on AOL today that was to pre-order the new "Bangles" CD. They actually are trying to make a comeback. That and I was told big hair and leg warmers are coming back in as well as those stupid off the shoulder sweatshirts that you can wear with your new tapered jeans. DID WE NOT LEARN ANYTHING?!? I can't deal if 80s style come back in. I'm going to hide in my room, crying in the fetal position, begging to some higher being that this is just a bad dream. These are all style of the 80s and the 80s were a fashion faux pas (<--is that correct? I can't spell in English, let alone French).

PS~ I saw freakin' pointy ugly shoes in the store. not the cute-never-go-out-of-style-expensive-designer pointy shoes. No, the freakin' ugly pointy shoes that were graciously replaced with shoes made for normal shaped feet.

You Can Hide Your Weed Here

So the trip didn't exactly make it to Waikiki. We went to Ala Moana and then to King St. where I got my nipple pierced. Let me tell you, it kind of stings. The guy who did it reminded me of Adam Sandler's character in THE HOT CHICK. I was just waiting for him to ask me where I kept my weed. Crazy stuff. I got a purse at Hot Topic and some candy to put in the box for RS. Also, I cracked my phone cover clear window thingy so I must get a new one. :-P sux.

My Trip

My Roommate and I caught a Rainbow Shuttle down to Long's Drugstore yesterday. I got deodorant (how do you spell that?), conditioner, packing tape, stuff to put in RS's and The future Mrs. JR's boxes, strawberry milk, and this awesome cup. This cup is one of those with the built in collapsible hard straws and now I have something substantial to put Tang in. I have a Powerpuff Girls "tumbler" but i have to refill the damn thing 8 times whenever I am really thirsty and at 8 am, I'm just not in the mood. We are going down to Waikiki today; the girl across the hall decided Roomie and I we stressing to hard about tests o Fri. We have the day planned out including Shave Ice and dinner at KC Drive Through. Then back to study our butts off. I'm sure it will prove to be quite an adventure.

Wednesday, September 17, 2003

Jesus Again

I saw Jesus again today at lunch. He was wearing a Godzilla t-shirt and had about 3 baskets of jalapeno quesedillas. Mmmm, yum.

Monday, September 15, 2003

i feel so lost in anatomy. i thought "nobody is really going to care THAT much if a crash this test, no ned to freak you don't know any of it and it is super hard and nobody in your class understands it either to help you." until Roomie reminded me i was here on an academic scholarship. crap. i don't have time for all the crap on sat. i have a paper for the Prof. but he told me "you need to come to lunch with us on sat. we'll pick you up at 11:45" grrr...... i hate this freaking place. i'm gonna fail this so bad, so much for my 4.0. so much for my free ride.

Sunday, September 14, 2003

They Get Paid For This?

I mean, the security guards were probably doing their jobs, but is it really necessary to use the walkie-talkie when you are within 3 feet of the other person?

Saturday, September 13, 2003

Slip-n-Slide

Slip-n-Slide contest last night in front of the A side of the building, RA's didn't care. Saw one guy's shorts almost ome off. Crack on the lawn.

Friday, September 12, 2003

Mom's Encounter With Druids

Me: i had noodles. what druids in the hallways?

Mom: But this little gnome in a giant green burnoose and huge white beard kept pacing back and forth in the 3rd floor hall



I know where I went to high school, this is entirely possible. Go see Palia for the first I actually heard of this happening.

Monday, September 08, 2003

my key

OH, my darling key you never work on any door;
Niether the one outside nor on the third floor.
I have lost all of my sanity
Because of RA vainity,
And they'll try to rocode you forever more.

Wednesday, September 03, 2003

at the grocery...

I didn't have any classes today because my class which is usually today wasn't held. Instead of making my day a waste, I walked down and got my hair cut and colored. It looks really cool. Then
I walked to Star Market which everyone told me was like an hours walk from here. Not so. It's like 5 minutes away. I got noodles, candy, cookies, ginger, Tang, Spaghetti-Os, and two books. Brain food. I want to go somewhere for Thanksgiving. BTW: I think my RA rocks. My floor rocks. I would really like to help cook (and eat) a home cooked meal. I'll be thinking.....