Thursday, March 31, 2005

Paper Break

I must take a hiatus from my blog. I have too much to do these last few weeks including 2 term papers, about 10 mini papers, a lrge presentation on a topic my teacher still needs to approve, and moving my stuff to another place. I just do no have the time at hte moment and will return when I get some of this knocked out.

Monday, March 28, 2005

Spring Break Highlights

Here it is, the extremely condensed version of my spring break. It was pretty eventful so I will just outline what happened and if you want to know more, just tell me.

Thurs. 3/17
Tab arrives. Eat at Denny's.
Fri. 3/18
Get fruit, eat at Hard Rock, watch a live band.
Sat. 3/19
Go to eat at my restaurant and then to Hookah Bar.
Sun. 3/20
Go to beach, rent mopeds, get hit by a stolen car in a car chase, go to club, meet some cuties, eat at Denny's
Mon. 3/21
Return mopeds, take a nap, eat at TGI Friday's
Tues. 3/22
Go to zoo and aquarium, go to a Luau
Wed. 3/23
Go Shooping, go to a BBQ, have a drink at E&S's house
Thurs. 3/24
Tab gets tattoo, I get ready for work, Tab leaves, find out one of my servers got in a REALLY bad car accident
Fri. 3/25
Did laundry all day, worked, ran into Nicole and hung out with her at her place of business, hung out with the guys I met on Sunday
Sat. 3/26
Got four piercings down my spine, went to work, saw some live bands
Sun. 3/27 (HAPPY EASTER!)
Spent $40 at Godiva store, picked up pictures, slept, rented Anchorman, held the hand of the guy who pierced me while he got tattooed, hung out with them after


That about sums it up.

Friday, March 18, 2005

SPRING BREAK!!

See you when it's over...

School's Out

SPRING BREAK!! See you when it's over...

School's Out

SPRING BREAK!! See you when it's over...

School's Out

SPRING BREAK!! See you when it's over....

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

Life's Little Questions

My sister brings up a very good point. There are many things we encounter in life we just didn't get taught in Carol Ann's class. She left out a few that I'm sure many people wonder about. Things like~

~How to tell your parents you're gay.
~How to tell your partner you have an STD/are pregnant.
~How to figure out who the father is.
~When is it time to have your stomach pumped?
~What to say the morning after a selacious drunk dial.
~How to recognize the signs of your roommate selling her body for money.
~How far is too far? (Is stripping ok vs. hooking? Is go-go dancing ok vs. stripping?)
~How to make your roommate pay her rent after you move out (because she doesn't want to pay anymore).
~How to deal with the smell of paper factories?
~How to deal with psychotic neighbors.

You know, now that I think about it there is a lot young adults could encounter in their late teens and twenties that just aren't talked about or are acceptable to talk about in today's society.

Thursday, March 10, 2005

Powerful Iodine

Ever notice how utterly unpleasent the things in your gyno's office are? For instance, Have you actually read all of the STD charts? Have you appreciated the pictures of herpes enlarged x10? Have you noticed the utterly disgusting picture of shingles on the herpes poster (which neglects to tell you shingles is not an STD)? Does it make you want to be tested every day? Have you looked at all the instruments and gagets and potions like "Sureglide" and "Sliderite" and tongue depressors? (what the hell do you use a tongue depressor for in a gyno visit?) I noticed a big bottle of prodine today. It was labled "POWERFUL IODINE SOLUTION" instead of "PRODINE" and was over by the naked man/woman insides chart of STDs and which organs they affect. The things that I couldn't figure out their uses (in a gyno office) were:
1. tongue depressors (open wide!)
2. a large container of baby powder (only a little more obvious than the...)
3. large container of baking soda
4. not so much the use, but I couldn't figure out why the "Sliderite" was in an aerosol can
5. the pillow on the chair because your head is never up high enough to rest on it

Any other odd devices you have found in the scary office?

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Diaries of a Honolulu Call Girl

At first it was a healthy (as healthy as you can get) infatuation with a pimp. Then it was hanging out with the pimp. I believe it has now progressed (or digressed depending on your point of view) into working for the pimp. My roommate is a call girl. She thinks I don't know and keeps trying to hide it from me and New Roommate, but we are smarter than that. I think it started Sunday, with the odd phone call I got from her:

She: Are you ok? I couldn't get a hold of you guys.
Me: We are at dinner, you know that.
She: I'm sorry I haven't been able to get all my money to you on time. I just want you to know that it won't happen any more.
Me: Is everything ok? Are you on drugs?
She: I'm fine, I'm not on drugs. Enjoy dinner.

That's the abbreviated version.

Her hair is much more blond. With bangs. Which I know she hates.

More reasons I think my roommate is a hooker:
1. She "gets ready for work" at the burger place where she works (or worked) in black pants and a slutty tank top I used to own. The uniform at the restaurant is khaki shorts, an aloha shirt, and tennis shoes.
2. New Roommate asked when she was going to pay back the money she owes NR. She said "hold on, let me call my job".
3. Mentioned having to work with a known hooker AT (not during) the pimps birthday party.
4. Not coming home till 6 in the morning. The restaurant closes at 11.
5. I caught the tail end of a conversation. "...I told him I was in college. He said, 'how can you be in college if you're only 15?'. I'm just seeing another side of humanity."
6. Saying how she can only eat one meal a day now.

The worst thing about it is I can't move out of my apartment now because I can't afford to pay double rent for that long (my lease isn't up till July 31). PLUS NR's current roommate is hanging down at the pimp's as well. I don't think it was my fault with poor choice of friends because she was a good student last year who went to school and didn't bring that many guys over. She's just spiraled out of control. I tried to help her, but now I think the best thing I can do is wash my hands of all this. (It's great reading the diary of a call girl, but living with one is a different story.)

Does anybody have any advice? They don't teach you about dealing with things like this in college.

At least she isn't a streetwalker.

Healthy Hamburger Tip

How many times have you come home and wondered, "What the hell shoudl I have for dinner that wont make my ass fat but still tastes good?" and end up making mac & cheese? I switched to hamburger helper. Instead of hamburger I used ground beef substitute like Boca Ground Burger. The Lasagna is the best one (I think). You can also use the ground meatless for things like veggie tacos (try adding spicy black beans in instead of refried beans).

Monday, March 07, 2005

Pimp Juice

So here's the thing...Nicole's hanging out with a pimp. Hanging out a whole bunch with a pimp. A real pimp. She met him at a club and he tried to get her to hook for him. Now she hangs out with him ALL the time. She had to get permission from his hookers to hang out with him. He actually does her lots of favors too like buying manicures and pedicures for her and my future roomate's current roomate (big sordid love triangle), buying her hair appointments, and so on. She even said that her hair has to go more blond because HE wants it to be more blond. All I have to say is WHAT THE HELL?! I mean, yeah, it's great she finally found a sugar daddy (and beleive me, he has the $ugar), but WHAT THE HELL?! How is it that all this crazy shtuff always happens to me? Personally, I've never met him, and honestly I don't care to. I don't see anything good coming from this.

PS~If anyone want to visit Hawaii and wants discounted visit with a female companion, I have the hook up.